An Open letter to those who won’t stop honking

Dear All-those-who-won’t-stop-honking-on-the-roads,

Sometimes I feel it’s the Newton’s law of inertia that is compelling you to do so. As Mr Newton said “An object at rest stays at rest and an object in motion stays in motion with the same speed and in the same direction unless acted upon by an external force.” This behavior can be described by saying that your hands “keep on doing what they are doing” unless a fellow commuter shows you a middle finger (or may-be-not).

Your unstoppable honking on the road is a parallel to a loud ‘excuse me’ with an overtone of indifference, which just makes you looks like a wreck of mental illness. Nobody is paying attention to it. The only response you are getting is from a few rightful ones who are abusing you silently, hoping you’d gather some sanity. But failed are the ones who thought the human species is much more evolved. You just don’t seem to understand that honking is not essential or mandated by the transport department. It’s also possible to drive and not honk, you see. It’s THAT simple.

Here are my suggestions to deal with your type of hooligans (in no order of priority):

1. Children should be deployed as volunteers on the sides of the roads to throw water balloons at you as soon as you honk more than thrice.

2. The horns should be equipped with an tiny leash that starts whipping you if you ‘blow’ more than 3 seconds (ignore the pun).

3. The driver seats can be replaced with a steel plate with a flamethrower under it, programmed to start after 3 secs of honking.

4. Your seats can be designed to start kicking your ass and topple you off the car onto the road if you still continue pressing your horn.

5. This one is for our government. Instead of banning beef, BAN HONKING.

Plus, you see, as someone driving in front of your vehicle, if there is some space, I WILL MOVE. I am not there just chilling on the road. STOP honking at me.